In the Pit

Rest in Peace. Martin Luther Powell
 
Funny thing happened after dad died … The sun had the nerve to come up the next morning. The world didn’t stop to mourn or even bat an eye.  I was forced to exist while it felt like I was only half the man I used to be. My world was in pieces because Pop was now resting.
 
Happy because he is in no more pain.

Sad because a piece of me was in that casket.

Confused because now how do I live? 

Angry because … Well just cause.
 
I am now like Joseph. This is my pit. This is when I see that it was never me holding onto God, but it was Him holding on to me.  … How do I know? I know because I wanted to let go, I tried to let go but those words of HIS  … “and He shall wipe away all their tears.” … “O Death where is thy sting? O grave where is thy victory?” ….  “I will never leave you” … “lean not into thine own understanding”. …”He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most high, shall abide in the shadow of the almighty.” …  Those words! That book!  … … That Man!

They were so real, they were so fresh. And then one day God said to me, “If I don’t answer your prayer the way you want AM I NOT STILL GOD?”
Faith? .. What about it?
 
What do you do when you try to claim Gods promises and God answers your prayers with, “Not this time” Do all things work together then? Anyone can praise God during a song and when the prayers are answered.
 
But show me what you got in the pit.
 
Its dark
Its cold

Its ugly
and at times … It’s lonely. 
 
Through the numbness of my “new” life God has still made it possible for me to laugh, love & live each day.
 

Sometimes I hurt,

Sometimes I cry,

Sometimes I laugh,

Sometimes I smile,

Sometimes I frown and sometimes I’m just … … … … … Quiet.
 
This is my pit. This is my lot. This is my cross. As I bear it God gives me strength. Correction God is my strength cause I’m just a sinner.
 
From the pit you realize life in its true perspective.
From the pit you realize how much you can take … and then some.
From  the pit the boys are separated from the Men.
The pit is a part of my training. God is in the process of making me a soldier and the powers of darkness should be very afraid of what I am becoming.  
 
Yes I’m in the pit now, but I have a grin on my face because I already see what I will become.

 

Even so come Lord Jesus.  Holla

 

EP